Eskimo Kiss Definition Essay

Definition of Eskimo kiss

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Other terms relating to 'kiss':

Definitions include: a "kiss" whereby one blinks one's eyelashes against another person's skin.
Definitions include: to kiss with an open mouth, usually placing one's tongue in the other person's mouth.
Definitions include: "hugs and kisses".
Definitions include: "kiss and make up".
Definitions include: a person who attempts to gain favor from a superior via blatantly false flattery or sycophantic behavior.
Definitions include: something specific that brings bad luck.
Definitions include: to go away.
Definitions include: a blunt refusal.
Definitions include: prepare to die.
Definitions include: the "Keep It Simple, Stupid Principle".
Definitions include: to vomit.
Definitions include: vomiting (typically after alcohol consumption)
Definitions include: a sycophant.
Definitions include: to flatter one's superior.
Definitions include: acronym for "kiss my teeth".

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Everybody kisses differently, and there are many ways to lay the lip-smack down on someone. Here are the types of kisses and the people who give them.

1. The Long Kiss

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Whoa, whoa, whoa, are you going for the record? This kiss is the kind you see in 1980s gum commercials. Usually, no tongue is involved and it’s just lips on lips for a VERY long time. It’s the kind of kiss that makes you miss a flight or a job interview. People ending relationships, going on long trips, and hopeless romantics love a long kiss. They want to make it count (and count and count and count and …).

2. Mr./ Mrs. Peck

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Do you want to show affection while you’re on the go? Do you need to appease someone who absolutely needs a kiss, but still want to leave them thinking, "What the hell was that?" Or maybe you’re both busy and want to make a gesture? The peck might be for you. In and out. Done. This kiss is perfect for yuppie power couples, or when someone has a secret that’s eating them up inside.

3. The Frenchie

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The french kiss is the kiss of all kisses, and the closest thing to sex without having sex. A part of your bodies are inside each other, swirling around and exchanging fluids. WOW! You two are in love and want everybody to know it. Not sure why it’s called the "French kiss", but if the kiss is any indicator, a trip to France might be like watching an X-rated movie. Teenagers, young couples, new relationships, and of course French people love this kiss.

4. The Sloppy

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Delivered by the kissing newbie, expect to get way more moisture than you bargained for. Imagine if your grandma took her teeth out and went to town on your grandpa’s face. Yikes. Now picture the little kid with glasses everybody picks on making out with an apple at lunch time. Gross. This kiss should be avoided at all costs, unless you have a roll of paper towels nearby. Dogs LOVE this kiss.

5. The Cheek Kiss

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A smooch on the cheek, when executed properly, is quick and dry. This kiss is usually between friends, or couples that have been together a long type, have lost the spark, and are afraid to admit it. Also, grandmas and aunts like this one, but they introduce some wetness that turns it into the "Sloppy Cheek Kiss".

6. The Lizard Kiss

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The kiss of weirdos and people who have no idea what they are doing, the lizard kiss involves a quick darting of the tongue into someone’s mouth just like a hungry lizard. It’s unsettling and makes you want to wash your mouth out. It’s hard to say who kisses like this, because you never really know who will give you nightmares with this one.

7. Stolen Kiss

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Is it a crime when a person swoops in, like a thief, an steals a kiss? Maybe. It sounds like more like assault than a kiss, but if one person can’t control themselves, this is the knee-jerk tactic that gives results. Be careful, though — sometimes a stolen kiss can result in a stolen face slap. This kiss is for all the unrequited lovers and deviants out there.

8. The Eskimo Kiss

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Technically not a kiss, the Eskimo Kiss involves two people using their noses to do a little kiss dance. It’s cold where Eskimos live, so apparently they substitute noses for mouth parts. Sure. Whatever, Eskimos. This kiss is also for new couples that are so in love it makes your stomach turn.

9. The Snooty Air Kiss

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When is a kiss not a kiss? When two people lean in close near each other’s face and make a kiss noise but don’t actually kiss. This is reserved for annoying friends and people from Beverly Hills. It is one of the grosser kisses.

10. The Open Eye Kiss

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Here is the kiss of psychopaths. Catch the other person staring at you when you take a peek and try not to feel creeped out.

11. The Neck Kiss or "Goose Bumper"

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With no moisture involved and light, this kiss is for people about to do it. If someone wants to drive the other crazy, then this is the kiss they use to sensually and slyly get the other person hot. It always results in goose bumps. The Casanova, horny toads, and pretty much every female are all big fans of this kiss.

12. The Lipsy-Russell

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A kiss that involves one person kissing or biting only the other person’s bottom lip. It’s a doozy. Someone either forgot they weren't eating a sandwich or they are ramping up to getting busy.

13. The Butterfly Kiss

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This is a kiss for lame-wads and little children. It involves placing eyelashes on someone’s arm or cheek and tickling them like a flying bug. It’s not really a kiss, because actual butterflies kisses are gross. They have long projectile tongues and … sorry we have to stop. Happy thoughts, happy thoughts …

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What other kinds of kisses are there? Let us know in the comments below! (Keep it clean, perverts!)

Check out 15 REALLY Awkward Kisses

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